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    The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course Blog

    News, views and entertainment from the world of proofreading.

    Proofreading Course Weekly Roundup: Anguilliform.

    2/19/2019

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    Proofreading Course Weird Word of the Week. Anguilliform: resembling an eel.
    This week’s weird words.
    A proofreader without a vast vocabulary is at a considerable disadvantage. So, every week we’ll be introducing you to some of the more unusual words to grace the English language.
    1. Anguilliform: resembling an eel.
    2. Transpicuous: transparent.
    3. Logomachy: an argument about words.

    This week’s tricky words.
    Even exemplary proofreaders have their little blind spots. The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course provides a comprehensive list of the tricky words that can trip up even the most experienced proofreader. Here are just three of them:
    1. Twelfth – twelth.
    2. Inoculate – innoculate.
    3. Hierarchy – heirarchy.

    This week’s proofreading exercise.
    From The Awakening by Kate Chopin:

    It was eleven o'clock that night when Mr. Pontellier returned from Klein's hotel. He was in an excellent humor, in high spirits, and very talkative. His entrance awoke his wife, who was in bed and fast asleep when he came in. He talked to her while he undressed, telling her anecdotes and bits of news and gossip that he had gathered during the day. From his trousers pockets he took a fistful of crumpled bank notes and a good deal of silver coin, which he piled on the bureau indiscriminately with keys, knife, handkerchief, and whatever else happened to be in his pockets. She was overcome with sleep, and answered him with little half utterances.

    He though it very discouraging that his wife, who was the sole object of his existence, evinced so little interest in things which concerned him, and valued so little his conversation.

    Mr. Pontellier had forgotten the bonbons and peanuts for the boys. Notwithstanding he loved them very much, and went into the ajoining room where they slept to take a look at them and make sure that they were resting comfortably. The result of his investigation was far from satisfactory. He turned and shifted the youngsters about in bed. One of them began to kick and talk about a basket full of crabs.

    Mr. Pontellier returned to his wife with the information that Raoul had a high fever and needed looking after. Then he lit a cigar and went and sat near the open door to smoke it.

    Mrs. Pontellier was quite sure Raoul had no fever. He had gone to bed perfectly well, she said, and nothing had ailed him all day. Mr. Pontellier was too well acquainted with fever symptoms to be mistaken. He assured her the child was consuming at that moment in the next room.

    He reproached his wife with her inattention, her habitual neglect of the children. If it was not a mother's place to look after children, whose on earth was it? He himself had his hands full with his brokerage business. He could not be in two places at once; making a living for his family on the street, and staying at home to see that no harm befell them. He talked in a monotonous, insistent way.

    Mrs. Pontelier sprang out of bed and went into the next room. She soon came back and sat on the edge of the bed, leaning her head down on the pillow. She said nothing, and refused to answer her husband when he questioned her. When his cigar was smoked out he went to bed, and in half a minute he was fast asleep.

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    Our proofreading course is ten years old this month!

    3/9/2018

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    A birthday cake for our proofreading course
    If someone had told me at the outset that, a whole decade later, I’d be running a successful business, I’d have raised an eyebrow, to say the least.

    Firstly, this was 2008. Things were not looking good for business. I can’t remember if anyone was using the term ‘The Great Recession’ at that point, but ‘financial crisis’ and ‘subprime mortgage crisis’ were in full circulation. Lehman Brothers had yet to bite the dust, but the writing was on the wall.
    The second reason I’d have raised an eyebrow was that it wasn’t really my intention to start a business. Not really.

    I was responding to an unfairness, to what I saw as a form of exploitation. Now I could be wrong, and this is just my opinion, but proofreading courses in 2008 were needlessly expensive. I mean, they’re needlessly expensive now, but we’re talking about 2008: Kung Fu Panda and the Sex and the City movie are still doing great box office and John Grisham's The Appeal is dominating the New York Times bestseller list.

    Hundreds of dollars for a proofreading course was just wrong. Or at the very least, it was unnecessary.
    The qualifications these proofreading courses offered were irrelevant. No one hiring proofreaders was asking for them. I knew that because I’d been hiring proofreaders for years and proofreading qualifications were not a part of any recruitment criteria. I looked at experience, and I had all applicants sit a test. A really tricky test. And that was it. No proofreading qualifications. No. Proofreading. Qualifications.

    The assessment process these proofreading courses insisted upon was unnecessary. Why did someone have to ‘mark’ work that was either right or wrong. These were not essays on the themes of justice and corruption in King Lear. These were public domain extracts with deliberate mistakes inserted into them. If they’d provided their students/customers with an answer sheet, they could have omitted the whole costly correspondence aspect of their business model, a cost passed onto you-know-who.

    Worst of all, these proofreading courses were expecting you to pay for grammar instruction. There were whole pages on dangling modifiers, split infinitives and when and where to use a semicolon. In 2018, all of that stuff is available free online. There are some fantastic grammar websites, and they won’t cost you a penny. Granted, in 2008, this wasn’t quite the case. The instruction was there but you had to put it together piecemeal. However, for about the cost of a cup of coffee, you could get hold of a second hand grammar book. Even a brand new grammar book would weigh-in at a fraction of the cost of these proofreading courses were expecting you to pay.

    Ten years later, and very little has changed. There are still a bunch of proofreading courses out there that are happy to charge you for the unnecessary. And The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course is still here, offering you a great-value alternative.

    Ten years. Wow.

    I’d just like to take this opportunity to thank everybody who has bought my proofreading training material over the years and for all those people, like Emma Steel, who have become advocates for The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course.

    If you’ve yet to give The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course a try, click here, to find out more. If you have any concerns or questions at all, please feel free to drop me an email here.

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    Are Proofreading Courses Worth It?

    7/26/2017

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    Are proofreading courses worth it?
    The answer is, yes, proofreading courses are worth it. Proofreading isn’t an innate talent; it’s a skill. There are lots of innate qualities that will make you predisposed to proofreading (such as vigilance and patience) but the skill itself really needs to be taught.

    A good proofreading course will (or should!) provide you with:
    1. A detailed description of what a proofreader does
    2. An explanation of proofreading symbols
    3. A glossary of terminology used by proofreaders, editors and printers
    4. A comprehensive proofreading methodology
    5. Advice on how to gain practical experience as a proofreader
    6. An account of how and where to find work as a proofreader
    7. Some kind of ‘ready reckoner’ to enable you to work out how much to charge as a proofreader
    8. Lots of proofreading practice material
    9. Lots of proofreading tips
    10. Great value.

    This last point is really the crux of this blog post.

    There are lots of proofreading courses out there. Some of them are very good. Some of them are mediocre. In all honesty, I’ve yet to come across a truly bad proofreading course.

    However, most of them, whether very good or mediocre provide very little in the way of value. They are, in a word, expensive. In some cases, they are ludicrously expensive.

    But why are these proofreading courses so expensive, whilst The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course is just $48.99?

    Does The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course cut corners?

    No, it most certainly does not. It provides you with items 1 to 10 in the list above. And when it comes to the tenth item on that list, I believe it offers the greatest value of any proofreading course currently available online or anywhere else.

    The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course does something those other proofreading courses don’t. It enables you to carry out self-evaluations.

    Those other courses provide you with proofreading exercises that you then have to submit for evaluation. This is an expensive process for the course provider, requiring a certain amount of infrastructure and resource.

    The thing is, these evaluations are pointless.

    Why? Because the proofreading exercises they provide have a definitive set of right answers. They consist of existing pieces of writing that have had deliberate errors shoehorned into the text. If they were simply to provide you with the answers, you wouldn’t need to submit them for evaluation.

    The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course does just that.

    But, you ask, if they don’t evaluate me, how do I get my proofreading qualification?

    The answer to that question is simple. You don’t need a proofreading qualification.

    I’ve carried out professional proofreading work for decades and not once have I been asked to produce a proofreading qualification. Moreover, whilst I was responsible for hiring proofreaders, not once did I (or any HR department, for that matter) request a proofreading qualification from any potential candidate for a proofreading role or assignment.

    If you find that shockingly unlikely, go into any employment website and search for proofreading roles. Scan through the skills and qualifications needed for the role and you won’t find a single reference to a proofreading qualification. Possibly an English qualification. Possibly a specific technical qualification if the role is in a specialized environment. But never a proofreading qualification.

    Put simply, proofreading course don’t need to be expensive. The information can be conveyed in simple eBook form and you can very easily evaluate your own progress.

    Are proofreading course worth it? Yes, in the sense that it’s always worth learning the skills, essential even. But are they worth it in the broader, financial sense of the word ‘worth’? To be frank, most of them are not.

    Don’t get me wrong, there are some people who prefer the support structure of a more traditional training method: tutors, classrooms, assignments, assessments, qualifications. And I get that. Some people feel as if they’re not really learning unless all these components are present and correct. But I think most of us would rather save a chunk of cash and have a little faith in ourselves.

    Let me know what you think in the comments section below.

    Thank you for your time.

    Mike

    If you're interested in giving The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course a try, click here to find out more.
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    Another Great Reason to Choose The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course

    7/4/2017

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    Picture
    Obviously, I’m biased, but I genuinely believe that The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course gives you the best shot at securing freelance or full-time work as a proofreader. It not only shows you how to proofread, it also tells you how to go about creating and promoting a proofreading business. And it’s ridiculously inexpensive.

    However, it’s been brought to my attention by a number of people who’ve bought and profited from The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course that there is an additional advantage to my particular product that I’ve failed to emphasize. Namely, the casual open-door policy I offer to all those who’ve purchased The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course.


    This is not something I’ve actively created as part of my business model, to be completely honest. It’s just that if someone emails me with a question or a concern, I think it’s rude not to at least try to provide an answer.


    People email me about intricate points of grammar, about what website platform to use, about whether they should accept a particular assignment, about where the line is drawn between proofreading and structural editing, about all kinds of things relating to my proofreading course, proofreading generally or the business side of proofreading. And, so far, I have answered every single email.


    Every single one.


    So, I want to take this opportunity to formalize this arrangement. From this point on, I will operate a virtual open-door policy for all customers of The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course. If you have a question, a concern or a conundrum relating to proofreading, feel free to drop me an email. I will do my level best to provide you with an answer within 48 hours. Now, obviously, I’m just one man, so there will be times, very occasionally, when I will not be able to honor this arrangement. But I will do my absolute best.

    If you wish to contact me, please use the form on the contact page, that way I will be able to alert you to any availability issues.


    Thank you.


    Mike
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    Proofreading Courses and What They Don’t Teach You: a Comprehensive Guide.

    1/6/2017

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    Proofreading courses, such as my own No-Nonsense Proofreading Course, will teach you how to proofread.

    Obviously.

    But there are lots of things that proofreading courses don’t teach you. My own proofreading course concentrates on method and technique as well as how to acquire proofreading assignments, testimonials and establish your own proofreading business. I did, however, leave a few things out in the interest of keeping things tightly focused and relevant. You can think of these topics as the scenes that end up on the cutting room floor when a movie is being edited. So, rather like the deleted scenes that turn up on a DVD release, here they are for your consideration and enjoyment.

    Proofreading Course Advice Don't Gloat

    Proofreading Course Deleted Scene One


    ​Proofreader Etiquette

    Proofreader etiquette is a very simple thing. In fact, it can be summed-up in just two little words:

    Don’t gloat.

    During my time as an Operations Manager at Shop Direct Home Shopping Limited, I had to hire a number of proofreaders. Some of these guys were old school proof readers and had been interrogating and signing proofs since not long after they’d made the transition from short trousers to long.

    Others however, were a little green around the gills and had been hired on the basis of their enthusiasm, attention to detail and sound command of the English language. These ‘young guns’, once they’d been around for a while and had made themselves comfortable, without fail, made the same schoolboy error.

    They gloated.

    At some point, they came across a spelling error or grammatical gaffe so outrageous that they just couldn’t resist the urge to make an issue of it. They would make a sarcastic comment in the margin or show the shameful blunder to their colleagues or even take the offending proof to the clanger’s originator and warm their hands on the glow from their blushing cheeks.

    Firstly, this is just plain rude. We’re only human. We make mistakes.  All of us. That’s why we have proof readers. Really, as a proofreader, you ought to be praising the sheer fallibility of humankind. Without it, you’d be out of a job.

    Secondly, what goes around comes around. We're only human. We make mistakes.  All of us. Including proofreaders. And God help the gloating proof reader who, in a moment of lapsed concentration, allows even the tiniest error to slip through his or her fingers.

    ​I’ve actually seen people queue for an opportunity to indulge in a little counter-gloating.


    Be warned.

    ​Be nice.

    Proofreading Course Advice No Post-It Notes

    Proofreading Course Deleted Scene Two


    Proofreaders, Beware! Post-It Notes are Dangerous!


    ​Don't get me wrong, I love Post-It notes.

    They’re great.

    Arthur Fry and Spenser Silver, I salute you!


    However.


    Whilst Post-It notes are perfect for leaving messages on desks, fridges, peoples’ foreheads and just about anywhere else, they are not the proofreader’s friend. It’s easy to be fooled into believing they are just that – the proofreader’s friend – because they make pretty good bookmarks, which gives them credibility as a literary accessory.


    However.


    They should not, ever, be used to pass on instructions to an author, typesetter or page make-up artist.


    And you can blame Mr. Silver for this one, if you feel so inclined. The adhesive created by Spenser Silver is intentionally low-tack. Which means Post-It notes can be peeled off, reapplied, peeled off, reapplied... It also means, of course, that Post-It Notes have a tendency to fall off.


    I know why Post-It Notes are employed as instruction-delivery systems from proofreader to author. They’re really useful (or seem really useful) when proofreading a piece of artwork, say a double-page spread of a magazine, where there’s very little room to write comments and queries.


    But you must resist. If those little yellow stickies drop off, your amends will never reach their destination. Or worse, the Post-It Note could drop off and be reapplied in the wrong place, assigning your remarks to an entirely different sentence or paragraph. Who knows what chaos could result from an incident like that?


    My advice? Either use a separate sheet of paper for queries (appropriately labelled) or use fully-adhesive white labels, the kind you use to label-up envelopes and packages.


    I love Post-It Notes. I really do. Except when I’m proofreading.

    Proofreading Course Advice Not Just Spelling

    ​Proofreading Course Deleted Scene Three


    Proofreading Isn't All About Spelling Errors and Grammatical Gaffes


    If anyone ever asks you what a proof reader does, for heaven’s sake don’t start talking about spelling mistakes and grammatical errors right off the mark. You’ll see their eyes glaze over in under a minute and they’ll do that stretching-mouth, flaring-nostrils thing which means they’re yawning but they don’t want to hurt your feelings so they’re trying to kind of seal it in.


    Do you remember that scene in Dead Poets’ Society when Robin Williams as John Keating asks his class for which single endeavor language was developed? He receives the unimaginative answer of “To communicate” and swiftly counters with, “No! To woo women!”


    Well, the ‘what does a proof reader do’ question should be tackled in pretty much the same way. That isn’t to say we proofread in order to dazzle the opposite sex (although, why not? Why not?), but it most certainly is about more than just spelling errors and grammatical blunders.


    We proofread to spare blushes. We proofread to protect our employers and clients from embarrassment.


    Let’s take a look at the kind of embarrassment, in fact the sheer humiliation which the strategic deployment of an effective proof reader would quickly have nipped in the bud.

    In December of last year, a school teacher spotted a spelling error on Monmouthshire Council’s recycling bags. The instruction to ‘separate’ various materials for recycling purposes was printed as ‘seperate’.

    An easy mistake to make, and not an uncommon one. Hardly humiliating, you might think.


    However, the teacher in question, Helen Pritchard, took the recycling bag to her class at Llanvihangel Crucorney School and asked her 20 pupils if they could spot the mistake. Without exception, the primary level students nailed it. They then wrote a letter to the council (see below) expressing their disapproval.
    Proofreading Course Advice
    Okay, having a classroom full of ten-year olds admonish you for poor spelling is a little embarrassing but still a few lengthy strides away from ‘humiliating’.

    Well, this little episode made it into the local press.

    Okay, we’re edging toward humiliating now, but we’re not all the way there yet.

    Then, the piece was taken up by the BBC and featured on their website. The BBC website receives 1.2 million page views and 80 million hits per month.

    Like I said: humiliating.

    ​So, we proofreaders don’t simply expose spelling errors and grammatical slip-ups. No, we shield our employers and clients from the searing heat of unwanted publicity in a media-soaked era. Okay, so we do that by trawling for spelling mistakes and poorly-executed English, but that's not going to hold anyone's attention at a dinner party, is it?


    Proofreading Course Advice the Right Red pen

    ​​Proofreading Course Deleted Scene Four


    Your Choice of Pen is Important


    After you’ve been proofreading for a while, you’ll start to get a little bit picky about pens. You’ll find some pens are too splodgy and some pens deliver precisely the right amount of ink onto the page. You’ll find some pens are too scratchy and some pens seem almost to caress the paper. You’ll find some pens are easy to grip and some pens are like eels with a nib. You’ll find some pens endure and some pens dry out if you leave the lid off for more than a nanosecond. You’ll find some pens are tough as Tonka toys and some pens are delicate and doomed. And, eventually, you’ll find a pen that, like Baby Bear’s porridge, is just right.


    It can take a while.


    Thankfully, there’s already somebody out there who’s as obsessive about pens as you are destined to be. He’s called The Pen Addict.  Not only does this guy product-test and review a plethora of pens, he also provides you with a large image of a writing sample (like the one above) for each pen so you can judge for yourself.


    You may find this pen-obsessive individual a little disturbing at first. Try not to be too judgmental, you’re looking at a snapshot of your future self.


    To help you along, I got in touch with The Pen Addict and he has kindly made a couple of recommendations.


    “I have had one or two proof readers mention to me that the Pentel Slicci 0.25mm red gel ink pen is one of their favorites. The line is sharp, consistent, and skip-free, and the red ink is bright. This pen has no problems stopping and starting. The only issue some have with this pen is that the barrel diameter is too narrow for their tastes. Another option would be the Uni-Ball Signo DX in 0.38mm or 0.5mm line widths. It comes in a 0.28mm, but it is much more scratchy than the Slicci.”


    ​Our thanks to The Pen Addict for his expert advice. Visit the website here.

    Proofreading Course Advice Not Grammar Police

    ​​​Proofreading Course Deleted Scene Five


    We are Proofreaders. We are Not the Grammar Police.


    The worst proofreaders, the very worst, perceive themselves as ‘guardians of language’, as defenders of ‘correct usage’. They actively seek out dangling modifiers, split infinitives, sentences ending with prepositions and so forth. Paradoxically, they appear to take pleasure in the displeasure that these contraventions cause them.


    I have no problem with people who are niggled by such things. People get niggled by things. It’s human nature. Personally, I can’t stand the ‘beep’ that supermarket bar-code readers make. I don’t know why. Something about the pitch and the clipped quality of the thing (it seems to stop just as it starts) winds me up.


    I also find the writings of the likes of Lynn Truss very entertaining. However, it is only that: entertainment. Eats, Shoots and Leaves shouldn’t be perceived as some kind of instruction manual. It’s a piece of linguistic fluff, not a stick for beating ‘less educated’ people with. I mean, ‘not a stick with which to beat ‘less educated’ people’.


    The proofreader who practically obliterates a document with red scrawl is not going to be very popular when further investigation reveals that the majority of his or her comments consist of little more than splitting hairs over split infinitives and the like.


    If you’re proofreading an academic tract, then, yes, you probably need to ensure that the strictest rules of grammar are adhered to. But the vast majority of documents you will proofread are likely to be presented in a less formal style, and intentionally so.


    When proofreading, don’t ask yourself whether or not something is grammatically correct; ask yourself is it clear, effective and pleasant to read? Obviously, some grammatical errors are likely to call into question the professionalism of the copy’s originator, so, yes, all those apostrophes do need to be in the right place and we don’t want ‘you’re’ where we’re supposed to have ‘your’ etc.


    As The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course relentlessly reiterates, let common sense be your guide.


    In my experience, the proof reader who labors over ‘who versus whom’ is the proof reader who misses a glaring spelling error in 36-point Helvetica Black.


    Proofreading Course Advice Eye Health

    ​​​Proofreading Course Deleted Scene Six


    Look After Your Eyes


    As a proofreader, your eyes are your most important asset, so it’s vitally important that you afford them the proper care and respect.


    The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course covers the importance of frequently resting your eyes and ensuring you attend regular appointments with your optician, but there is another area of eye care which is just as important. 
    Nutrition.

    ​Poor eye health is often brought about as a result of poor diet. The right foods, containing the right vitamins, minerals, antioxidants and so forth, can play a significant role in ensuring clear and effective vision long into your twilight years. And that means an effective and sustained income long into your twilight years, too.


    Now, you don’t need me to tell you about the importance of Vitamins A, C and E (commonly referred to as ‘antioxidant vitamins’); you’ll find them in green vegetables, oranges, tomatoes, raw carrots, peppers, Brussel sprouts and so forth, and it goes without saying that they’re very good for your eyes.


    However, less is known about the antioxidants Lutein and Zeaxanthin (now there's something to add to your dictionaries!). Collectively known as 'carotenoids', these antioxidants have been identified as contributing to a reduction in AMD or Age-related Macular Degeneration.


    Both Lutein and Zeaxanthin occur naturally in a host of fruit and vegetables. Lutein can be found in mangos, bilberries, yellow peppers, kale, spinach and broccoli. Zeaxanthin occurs in oranges, sweet peppers, broccoli, corn, some lettuces, spinach, tangerines and eggs.


    As you can see, some of the fruits and vegetables rich in eye-loving vitamins A, C and D are also reliable sources of Lutein and Zeaxanthin.


    If anyone has any recipe ideas that contain a good helping of the fruits and vegetables listed above, let us know!

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    Proofreading Course: Free Bonus Materials Added

    1/5/2017

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    Hello all.

    As you may have noticed, I've added rather a lot of extra bonus materials to The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course. All of these are designed to augment your proofreading skills, assist you in securing employment or running your own proofreading business.

    Before I go into a little more detail, I'd just like to assure any customers who have purchased The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course in the last year or so, who may be feeling a little agrieved (and quite rightly so!) that I'm more than happy to send you the additional freebies if you get in touch via the Contact page. Proof of purchase would be useful but I'm not going to insist upon it.

    Anyway, here's a little preview of those shiny new freebies:
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    The Proofreading Course Bulletin

    11/14/2016

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    Proofreading Course Bulletin Book Image

    Proofreading in the News

    Spelling Mistakes Don’t Always Spell Disaster

    It’s natural to assume that spelling errors will always devalue something: a document, an advertisement, a press release and especially a book.


    But when it came to a rare first edition of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, this certainly wasn’t the case.


    In fact, a spelling error on the back cover meant the book was so rare and unusual it fetched almost $60,000 when it went under the hammer at Bonham’s auctioneers in Knightsbridge, London.


    The spelling error? The second ‘o’ was missing from the word “Philosopher's” on the back cover of the book, so that it read, "Acclaim for Harry Potter and The Philospher's Stone".


    Lucky for Harry Potter, he was far less lackadaisical when it came to spelling.


    Source: Evening Standard, London.

    ​The Proofreader's Vocabulary Boost

    A proofreader’s vocabulary is one of their most valuable tools. So here are some words to give you the edge. And if they don’t come up in any documents you’re proofreading, they might help you win at Scrabble.

    Autotomy: the casting off of a limb or other part of the body by an animal under threat, such as a lizard.

    Incunabula: books printed before 1501.

    ​Thalassic
    : relating to the sea.

    ​​Proofreading isn’t all about publishing…

    Duties for a Legal Secretary vacancy at healthcare consortium Kaiser Permanente in Los Angeles include preparing, editing and proofreading legal correspondence, presentations and other practice area related documents.
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    The Proofreading Course Bulletin

    10/31/2016

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    This is the first in a regular feature, in which I will be compiling various things of interest to proofreaders.

    ​Proofreading in the News

    It isn’t often the subject of proofreading is actually considered newsworthy. But for every long-awaited novel, there’s a professional proofreader toiling in the background. And could there be a novel more long-awaited than The Winds of Winter, the sixth book of George R.R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire sequence, more widely (and incorrectly) known as Game of Thrones?

    The last book in the sequence was released in 2011. Rumor has it that volume six is currently in the hands of its proofreader. Now, I’ve worked on some high-pressure proofreading assignments but this takes the biscuit. I can’t even begin to imagine the pressure this proofreader is under!

    Epic Novel Proofreading

    ​Embarrassing Proofreading Errors

    Fans of the Cleveland Browns sitting in the Dawg Pound section of the FirstEnergy Stadium could have benefitted from the assistance of a proofreader and a drone, as they unfurled their three-part banner during a their game against the New York Jets.

    ​Instead of reading ‘This is the Dawg Pound’, it read ‘This is GPODAWUND’. The phrase was soon trending as a hashtag on Twitter.
    Proofreading in the news

    The Proofreader's Vocabulary Boost

    A proofreader’s vocabulary is one of their most valuable tools. So here are some words to give you the edge. And if they don’t come up in any documents you’re proofreading, they might help you win at Scrabble.

    Galeanthropy: noun. A mental condition of thinking that one has become a cat, usually manifest in the adoption of feline mannerisms and habits.

    Tabloidese: noun. The language and style of writing characteristic of sensationalist tabloid journalism; also called ‘tabloid-speak’.

    Quadragesimarian: noun. One who observes Lent.


    (All words courtesy of The Phrontistery website)

    ​Proofreading isn’t all about publishing because…

    … Citrin Cooperman, an accounting, tax, and consulting firm, are currently seeking a proofreader in their New York office.
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    Your first proofreading assignment. And why you shouldn’t accept it.

    6/21/2016

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    First proofreading assignment
    Chances are the first assignment you will find yourself faced with once you take your initial tentative steps on the road to becoming a professional proofreader will be proofreading someone’s novel.

    The novel will likely be the work of a family member or friend, or a friend of a friend.

    I would strongly recommend you reject the assignment.

    I’m serious. Run away.

    A ‘fresh pair of eyes’ isn’t going to cut it, pal.
    Why? Because this budding author doesn’t want you to proofread their novel at all. They want you to edit it. Oh, they’ll say things like, “I just need someone to run a fresh pair of eyes over it.” They’ll say things like, “I’ve checked it myself, like a hundred times, so it’s going to be pretty much error-free.” They’ll say things like, “You’re just looking for anything glaring that I might have overlooked, that’s all.”

    Don’t believe a word of it. That’s not to say they’re lying. Chances are they genuinely believe their literary debut is pretty much error-free, contains the odd overlooked glaring error, and just needs a fresh pair of eyes running over it. But they’re wrong. They’re so very, very wrong.

    The fact is, their magnum opus doesn’t need proofreading, at all. Not yet, at least. No, their work needs editing. It needs editing badly. Which means it needs the attention of an editor before a proofreader ventures anywhere near it.

    You are not an editor. At least, not yet.
    Now, you may aspire to becoming an editor. If so, great. But this site is about proofreading, and my eBook is a proofreading how-to guide. And, as I’ve pointed out on a number of occasions, proofreading and editing are very different activities. Editing is very much about the quality of a manuscript. Proofreading is about the accuracy of a piece of work.

    Don’t get me wrong, proofreading improves the quality of a manuscript no end but it does so by removing the inaccurate spelling, grammar and so forth that marks out a piece of writing as second rate. What’s more, there’s nothing wrong with a proofreader making the odd recommendation that would normally fall to the editor, but such suggestions should only be occasional and should be very far from the core focus of what the proofreader is attempting to achieve.

    At the risk of stating the obvious, quality is subjective, a matter of opinion. Conversations between editors and writers tend to be closer to a negotiation, with the editor’s recommendations often accompanied by a persuasive argument. Proofreaders and writers rarely need to communicate directly with one another. More often than not, our archaic red-pen squiggles say all that needs to be said.

    Most first novels remain unpublished for a reason
    Now, you could approach the proofreading of your friend-of-a-friend’s novel silently intoning the mantra, “My business is not to edit. My business is to proofread. My business is not to edit. My business is to proofread.” But I guarantee that before you get to the end of the second page, you’ll be biting you tongue, your mind a whirl of recommendations that will not simply improve the work of our budding novelist but will lift it from the realms of utter dross into something that might, with a great deal of work, just about be made fit for public consumption.

    I know this seems harsh. It is harsh. But the chances are the novel you’re asked to proofread will be, at best, mediocre. Chances are, it will be an incomprehensible mess, which will elicit a despondent sigh and a mumbled, “Where do I even start?”

    My advice: don’t agree to proofread a novel that hasn’t already been rigorously and independently edited. A novel that has been subjected to the often-harsh scrutiny of an editor will, by and large, only require proofreading. And that’s your job. That’s what you’ve trained for. An unedited novel is a metaphorical and literal headache just waiting to happen. Your headache.

    There are exceptions, of course. There are first novels that materialize as if by magic and set the literary world aflame. And these incendiary debuts are written by people who have families, by people who have friends and whose friends have friends. There may well be a Rowling out there who was approached by their second cousin, Joanne, with a polite, “I’ve heard you do a bit of proofreading. You wouldn’t mind casting a fresh pair of eye over this, would you?”

    The chances are vanishingly remote, however.

    We live in the age of self-publishing. And I think that’s fantastic. For writers. For proofreaders, it’s an utter freaking nightmare. Because the traditional gatekeepers are no longer at their posts. And again, this is great. For writers. They can get their work out there, build up a readership and, as long as they’re prepared to do their growing-up in public, find success. But for proofreaders... like I said: utter freaking nightmare.

    If you find it hard to say ‘no’...
    Okay, so our budding novelist has deployed their best puppy-dog eyes and is staring at you with imploring desperation. You just can’t find it in your heart to say ‘no’.

    Whatever you do, whatever you do, don’t say ‘yes’.

    Say, “I’ll tell you what, just because it’s you, I’ll take a look at it. I’m not promising anything. If I think it isn’t ready for proofreading, I’ll hand it back and advise you to take it,” and your damned puppy-dog eyes, “to an editor. Okay?”

    Then, without so much as picking up a red pen, give the first two pages of the manuscript a read. That’s going to be about 500 words or so. If, after you’ve read those first 500 words you’ve only spotted the odd silly mistake, then read the next 500 words. Keep doing that until you’ve flicked through about 20 pages of manuscript. If you’re only encountering silly little errors and minor oversights, then and only then accept the assignment.

    This won’t happen, of course. Well, maybe it’ll happen.

    It’s far more likely that by the time you get to the end of page two, you’ll be confused as to who’s doing what to whom, or why they’re doing it. You’ll have encountered at least four passive sentences, three dangling modifiers, a handful of clichés, a surfeit of adverbs and more synonyms for ‘said’ than you even knew existed. And the seed of that headache I promised you will have started to sprout its first agonizing little shoot.

    Hand the manuscript back and say, “There’s definitely something good here. But it needs an editor.”

    So when you find yourself staring down at a manuscript so besmirched with red ink it looks like it’s been used as a prop in a Quentin Tarantino movie, and you’re wondering where the time went (midnight, already?), don’t say I didn’t warn you. Because I warned you.

    Best of luck with all your proofreading endeavors.

    Check out my Proofreading Course. It's a lot cheaper than any other proofreading course currently available. A lot cheaper. To find out more, click here.
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    Proofreading Exercise 5: An Extract from ‘The Life and Death of a Proofreader’.

    5/28/2016

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    Proofreading fiction can be a bit of a challenge.

    In which, the proofreader must bite his tongue.

    The proofreader glares down at a manuscript that is positively swarming with red ink and vows never to accept an assignment from a ‘budding novelist’ ever again.

    The budding novelist in question is Gary Draper, the proofreaders wife’s cousin. The novel is entitled The Pirate. The plot, insofar as there is a plot, concerns a serial killer, with an eye patch and a hook for a hand, who is whittling his way through a cast of unconvincing characters in a holiday resort in the Caribbean. No motive is given for these slayings aside from the fact that The Pirate is deranged. All The Pirate’s victims are young women who have made the fatal error of looking great in swimwear. Gary has entirely overlooked the fact that a novel requires a protagonist or, indeed, a point.

    It wouldn’t be so bad if the writing itself was competent. It isn’t. It would be inaccurate to describe the author’s attitude to grammar as ‘rule breaking’ because that would suggest that Gary knew the rules in the first place. He very clearly doesn’t. There are more split infintives and dangling modifiers than you can shake a stick at, and the entire thing appears to have been written in the passive voice. The proofreader finds this latter point almost funny, that such an unpleasant and aggressive piece of prose could be described in any way as passive.

    But split infinitives and dangling modifiers are as nothing compared to some of Gary Draper’s grammatical atrocities. The word ‘have’ seems to have been abandoned in favor of the increasingly popular and utterly unacceptable ‘of’. In Gary’s particular iteration of the multiverse, the apostrophe has been rendered extinct. And spelling, it would seem, if Mr Draper is to be believed, is for losers.

    All of this, however, is tolerable. These kind of errors are meat and drink to the intrepid proofreader. Obviously, it is not typical for there to be quite so many of them but they are not, in and of themselves, unusual. What is really driving the proofreader in the general direction of the kitchen sink (beneath which is stored the emergency brandy) is the fact that Gary’s writing seems intent upon summoning the proofreader’s inner editor.

    He is not an editor. He has never been an editor. He has worked with many great and talented editors in his time but he does not count himself among their number. He is a proofreader. He has been a proofreader all his working life. He will be a proofreader until the day his lips turn blue and they pry his red pen from his cold, dead hand. But Gary Draper’s awful writing has him critiquing instead of proofreading; it is forcing him to leave the objective world of right and wrong, and taking a few awkward steps into the subjective world of the editor. He doesn’t want to waist valuable red ink telling Gary that an adult novel can’t contain the expression “He was as crafty as a fox” and expect to be taken seriously, and yet he feels compelled to do so.


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