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“...we’ve got a spell checker! Get with the times! Your skills have been supplanted by computer technology! Welcome to the Space Age!”
Okay, I’m exaggerating a little, but that’s what I get for watching The Treasure of the Sierra Madre one too many times. That said, you may find, as a proofreader seeking out work opportunities you often encounter what I call ‘the spell checker defence’: “What do we need a proofreader for? Microsoft Word checks our spelling and grammar.” If you’ve read The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course, you’ll know that I’m not entirely opposed to spell checkers (and if you haven’t read The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course... what’s keeping you?). Spell checkers have their place in the proofreader’s toolbox. In the hands of someone other than a proofreader, however, they’re a positive liability. Now for a statement that might for some seem a little counterintuitive (or just plain wrong): Spell checkers can’t detect spelling mistakes. What? It’s true. They can’t. What a supposed ‘spell checker’ actually does is highlight words that do not feature in its database. That’s a very different thing. If the word features in its database, Mr Spell Checker just nods and moves on, irrespective of whether or not it’s the right word. To illustrate just how problematic this can be, let’s take a look at some memorable opening lines. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wipe. Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice It was a pleasure to burp. Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451 The following, from the opening of Faulkner’s The Sound and the Fury, could have provided a particularly illuminating example, but in the interest of good taste, I’ll leave it to you to decide just how horribly wrong things can go if left to the devices of our mindless Mr Spell Checker. Through the fence, between the curling flower spaces, I could see them hitting. Not very pleasant, I know. 20 years ago, when I was copywriter and, by default, proofreader at McGee, Parsons and Associates, I was prevented from proofreading a skiwear catalogue by a client who wished to save money. He declared that he had a perfectly good grasp of the English language and could proofread it for himself. Unfortunately, he didn’t proofread it; he handed it over in its vulnerable entirety to his good friend Mr Spell Checker. In the finished, printed and handsomely bound catalogue a reference to ‘luxurious casual wear’ appeared as ‘luxurious casual sex’. Oops. To say the least. After that, as you can imagine, the client in question always considered the modest outlay for the services of an effective proofreader as money very well spent. If anyone ever asks you what a proof reader does, for heaven’s sake don’t start talking about spelling mistakes and grammatical errors right off the mark. You’ll see their eyes glaze over in under a minute and they’ll do that stretching-mouth, flaring-nostrils thing which means they’re yawning but they don’t want to hurt your feelings so they’re trying to kind of seal it in. Do you remember that scene in Dead Poets’ Society when Robin Williams as John Keating asks his class for which single endeavour language was developed? He receives the unimaginative answer of “To communicate” and swiftly counters with, “No! To woo women!” Well, the ‘what does a proof reader do’ question should be tackled in pretty much the same way. That isn’t to say we proofread in order to dazzle the opposite sex (although, why not? Why not?), but it most certainly is about more than just spelling errors and grammatical blunders. We proofread to spare blushes. We proofread to protect our employers and clients from embarrassment. Let’s take a look at the kind of embarrassment, in fact the sheer humiliation which the strategic deployment of an effective proof reader would quickly have nipped in the bud. In December of last year, a school teacher spotted a spelling error on Monmouthshire Council’s recycling bags. The instruction to ‘separate’ various materials for recycling purposes was printed as ‘seperate’. An easy mistake to make, and not an uncommon one. Hardly humiliating, you might think. However, the teacher in question, Helen Pritchard, took the recycling bag to her class at Llanvihangel Crucorney School and asked her 20 pupils if they could spot the mistake. Without exception, the primary level students nailed it. They then wrote a letter to the council (see below) expressing their disapproval. Okay, having a classroom full of ten-year olds admonish you for poor spelling is a little embarrassing but still a few lengthy strides away from ‘humiliating’.
Well, this little episode made it into the local press. Okay, we’re edging toward humiliating now, but we’re not all the way there yet. Then, the piece was taken up by the BBC and featured on their website. The BBC website receives 1.2 million page views and 80 million hits per month. Like I said: humiliating. So, we proof readers don’t simply expose spelling errors and grammatical slip-ups. No, we shield our employers and clients from the searing heat of unwanted publicity in a media-soaked era. Okay, so we do that by trawling for spelling mistakes and poorly-executed English, but that's not going to hold anyone's attention at a dinner party, is it? Working from home. Being your own boss. It sounds like a dream.
At first. But after just a few days of determined effort and sheer, unbridled enthusiasm, the concentration begins to wander. The television beckons, or the radio, or the coffee pot, or that little household task that turns into a whirl of domestic activity, and suddenly you’re asking yourself, “Where did the day go?” And you realise just how much you may have needed that pain-in-the-backside boss cracking the whip and endlessly growling about productivity and seasonal targets. You begin to wonder if you haven’t made a terrible mistake. Maybe you’ve overestimated your determination to succeed. Maybe you just don’t have what it takes to be self-employed. Maybe it’s time to brush up your resume and begin the hunt for full time, permanent employment. Don’t worry. You’re just going through what almost every self-employed, home-working individual goes through during the early days of their new commercial endeavour. But what to do about it? Well, remember that pain-in-the-backside boss cracking the whip and endlessly growling about productivity and seasonal targets? We’re going to invite him into your home. In a manner of speaking. We’re going to create a virtual boss, a to-do list with attitude. Now, everybody can create a to-do list. Some people can even stick to it. Unfortunately, most people tend to adhere to it for a while then begin to let it slide. And once it begins to slide a little it’s remarkable how easy it is to ignore it entirely, rather like the boss who begins to lose your respect. That’s why our to-do list needs to have attitude. It needs to be compelling. Your to-do list doesn’t just need to tell you what to do, it needs to tell you what’s at stake. And not in a vague way, either; it needs to be specific and concrete. For example, say you need to put together a list of all the businesses in your area that might benefit from your proofreading expertise. Put it on your to-do list. Next to it, or underneath it, write down exactly when this task needs to be done by. Don’t put ‘ASAP’, give an exact time and date, based upon how long you think the task will reasonably take, bearing in mind any other activities you might have on-going. Now, this is the important bit. Write down what will happen if you do achieve this target. So, you might write: “If I compile this list by tomorrow lunchtime, I’ll be able to mail to potential customers the same day and commence follow-up calls in 48-hours. This means by the end of the week I should be looking at securing my first assignments.” How exciting is that? First assignment by the end of the week? There’s something to aim for. Now, write down what will happen if you don’t complete this task by the designated time. Be harsh. Be that pain-in-the-backside boss. Write something like: “If I don’t put myself on the radar of these businesses by the end of the week, somebody else will, and not only will I lose their business in the short-term, I could lose it indefinitely. This could seriously damage my business.” Every task you assign yourself should be treated in exactly the same fashion. Every task should have a realistic (but maybe a little challenging) timeframe and clearly described consequences if you do or don’t complete the task on time. That pain-in-the-backside boss was probably a pain-in-the-backside for a reason. He or she fully understood the consequences of inactivity, poor productivity and less than 100% commitment. And once you begin to reap the benefits of your ‘to-do list with attitude’, so will you, and your business will begin to grow and thrive. The first in what I hope to be a series of fun blog entries entitled 'A World Without Proof Readers'.
Proofreading. It’s an odd profession, isn’t it? Spending your days scouring someone else’s documents for spelling errors and grammatical imperfections? It’s no surprise that proof readers are perceived as strange little creatures: hunched as we are over our proofs, red pen in hand, obsessing over the tiniest details. We need quiet. We can’t be doing with distractions. We seem like an antisocial bunch. But we’re just getting on with our work. We’re just doing our bit. And we’re proud of our contribution, aren’t we?
Aren’t we? Well, not always. In fact, not often. Too frequently, we regard ourselves as the interfering busybodies of the publishing world, the nosy neighbour with the perpetually-twitching net curtain. We don’t create anything. We don’t produce anything. Whatever we work on, we can’t genuinely lay claim to the end product. Well, maybe that’s true. Maybe we can’t lay claim to a document in its entirety, but we do make a very legitimate and substantial contribution to the health and wellbeing of a document and, by extension, the business or organisation said document promotes or represents. Errors cost money. Errors incur bad publicity. Errors can take the shine off an otherwise pristine reputation. The work we do is not only important, it’s vital. And we should be proud. Which is why we’ve produced a range of handsome-looking merchandise over at our store. Let’s celebrate our status as proof readers. Let’s tell the world what it is we do and how hopelessly devoid of quality the published word would be without us. Say after me, “I’m proud to be a proof reader!” Well, this is it. Day one. The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course is now available to buy.
It's taken the better part of a year to condense 20 years of proofreading experience into a single, no-nonsense ebook. I'm very pleased with the result and I hope you'll agree. But this website isn't just a piece of elaborate salesmanship intended to convince you to part with your hard-earned cash; it's also a resource in its own right, containing a wealth of proofreading knowledge and information and lots of links to useful websites. So, please subscribe to our RSS feed. You won't want to miss out. Next time, we'll be looking at proofreading etiquette. |
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“I am one of those many fools who paid a huge amount of money for a useless course. This book... has opened so many doors for me. I now look on Mike as my mentor as I embark on a career. Thank you Mike.” Emma Steel, Proofreader and International Structural Editor. “ I thoroughly enjoyed the course and am so glad that I decided to take it... the whole experience was invaluable. My proofreading service is now well established and your course played no small part in getting it off the ground.” Hache L. Jones, Proofreader. “I'd just like to thank you first of all for writing such a great, straight forward eBook, and then going above and beyond what I would even expect as a customer by providing us, completely free of charge, updated versions months later!” Rachel Gee, Trainee Proofreader. “What can I say? Worth every penny and then some! God Bless! This a fabulous course.” Teresa Richardson, Proofreader. “As someone who has effectively been proofreading for thirty years, I found Mike’s No-Nonsense Proofreading Course an invaluable introduction and a very useful practical guide to many aspects of this discipline. I can wholeheartedly recommend it as the ideal starting point, and much more besides.” Jeremy Meehan, Proofreader. Blog AuthorMy name's Mike Sellars and I'm an experienced proofreader and the author of The No-Nonsense Proofreading Course. Click here to find out more about me. The No-Nonsense Proofreading CourseA Fraction of the Cost of Other Proofreading Courses NOTE: Stock is currently limited to 10 per day, so we can continue to deliver exceptional after-sales service, answer queries and provide open-door support. Credit card and PayPal payments accepted. “As someone who has been proofreading for 30 years, I found Mike’s course an invaluable introduction and a very useful practical guide to many aspects of the discipline. I can wholeheartedly recommend it.” Jeremy Meehan, Proofreader. Still want to find out more? Click here. Proofreading Categories
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